May. 22nd, 2012 03:05 pm
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What is a life
to live
with psychosis?

The answer is: not a life at all.

I am but one of the many people with psychotic episodes. Psychotic Major Depression, actually.

It's not a life at all.
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I'm finally posting again. Woo! Well, I bought an iPad 2 and it's wonderful. I love reading comics on it.

Comic I'm currently reading:

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You can't trust 99% of people.


Jul. 15th, 2011 09:15 pm
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Just some icons I've made. I like to make icons. :)

If you snag, please credit!

[1-2] Books & Reading
[3] Feelings - Misery
[4] Inception
[5-6] Mirrormask - the Dark Queen
[7] Pride & Prejudice - Mr. Darcy
[8] Liv Kristine - from Cradle of Filth "Nymphetamine" music video.
[9-10] Jenny Lewis
[11] Cupcakes

1 2 3 4
5 6 7 8
9 10 11
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Vampire. I'm naturally an evil person.
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Read it! I'm halfway through the book and it's delightful. READ IT! I have the official ebook.
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A big technique--probably the most popular. Traditional Shamans have used drums and in some regions there are certain places they go to play drums to enhance the induction of trance via drumming because of the way the drumming echoes.

.. still in progress ..
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Trance postures aid in the art of inducing trance and this is most likely due to the amount of stress on the body and/or change in blood flow to the different parts of the body. For example, there is a posture called the "Nupe Mallam" that I have tried and had rather quickly gone into a light trance. The reason for only going into a light trance was because I was very aware of my surroundings and only wanted to try the posture. The posture is rather stressful on the arm and blood flow to the leg is cut off a bit. One will experience a bit of numbness in both extremities.

Nupe Mallam diviner (Mair 1969: 94)

Here is an excerpt by Howard G. Charing on how to position the body into a Nupe Mallam posture:
Sit on the floor, leaning toward your left and supported by your left arm. Hold your left arm rigid, with your hand at a right angle to your body. Place your left hand at a spot three to five inches to the left of your body and just behind a straight line drawn along the back of your buttocks. Bend both legs at the knees with both feet pointing to the right, positioned so that your left foot is resting just to the left of your right knee. Place your right hand on your lower left leg, where the muscle indents about halfway down your calf. Move your head slightly to the left, so you are looking over your left knee, and close your eyes.

And he gives the basic tips that one should have a a clear intent and listen to drumming and/or rattling to enhance and aid in the experience, however one should know to have an intent before participating in hedge-riding. Why would one cross the boundaries for no reason? Charing's article is exploring shamanism, though, not a hedgewitch's practice.

Gore's and Goodman's writings claim that different postures have different feeling associated with them, and once again this is most likely due to the postures either restricting blood flow or being positioned in such an abnormal way that the blood flows differently throughout the body. Goodman's experimentation results on different postures and shamanic trance has in fact shown the different feelings associated with different postures and trance induction. These feelings include physical and emotional changes, such as tingling or numbness in the body and significant changes in mood.

We see different ecstatic body postures in different cultures and they have no doubt affected consciousness in some way or another because of the physiological changes occurring when one changes their body posture and ultimately changing blood flow.



☆ Barendsen, Kristin. "Sing the Body Ecstatic!" Yoga Journal 133 (1997): 166. Print.
☆ Goodman, F. D. "Body Posture and the Religious Altered State of Consciousness: An Experimental Investigation." Journal of Humanistic Psychology 26.3 (1986): 81-118. Print.
☆ Goodman, Felicitas D. Where the Spirits Ride the Wind: Trance Journeys and Other Ecstatic Experiences. Bloomington: Indiana UP, 1990. Print.
☆ Gore, Belinda. Ecstatic Body Postures: an Alternate Reality Workbook. Santa Fe, NM: Bear &, 1995. Print.


Where the Spirits Ride the Wind: Trance Journeys and Other Ecstatic Experiences
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In some practices for crossing the hedge, or travelling between the worlds, disorientation often plays a part in such. For anyone who has experienced sleep deprivation, he or she knows that disorientation often accompanies the inability (or perhaps choosing not to sleep and for other various reasons) to sleep.

Sleep deprivation is a technique some shamans or crossers use to aid in walking between the worlds. Sleep deprivation provides such a sense of detachment from one's physical body. This sense of detachment provides the ease of walking between the worlds as one may not necessarily feel as they are grounded, or "in the moment", being that they do not feel like they are currently within their own world (Midgard).

Personally, sleep deprivation is one of my preferred techniques to walk between the worlds for reasons as I stated above. Sleep deprivation gives me such a feeling of detachment that if I start to dance or listen to drumming, my disorientation and sense of detachment from my physical body increases threefold, resulting in the ultimate goal of travelling down into the Underworld.
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this deviantArt framed canvas print is so pretty! and I'm in love with my own photo on it xD:

next up is levitation photos ♥

deviantArt gallery
here is some of my artwork to chill your hearts to my temperature

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I'm currently reading What-the-dickens and Wicked. But I just got a book from the library called Kept by D.J. Taylor. It's a Victorian mystery! You know how much I love VICTORIAN mystery?!

DL Link For Wicked: Wicked Series

If you love the Victorian era AND you love mystery than I suggest The Seance by John Harwood.

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21. It should remain the same. But it PISSES ME OFF how teens drink and crap (and adults) and then go out driving. They kill INNOCENT PEOPLE ON THE FUCKING ROAD YET THEY DON'T DIE? That pisses me off to no end. The damn drunks should die, not the innocent people on the road.
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Los Caprichos by Goya

What is hedge-riding?

Hedge-riding is when one's spirit takes flight into one of the Otherworlds (either the Upperworld or the Underworld) in search of wisdom, speaking with the dead and ancestors, etc.

What is the symbolism of the hedge?

The hedge was a boundary between worlds and separated outside life with inside life. "Riding" the hedge is crossing into that outdoor world, the "wild" world. The hedge is a symbol of Midgard (or middle earth; physical realm), in between the Upperworld and the Underworld.

Hedge-rider, according to Eric de Vries, can be translated from many languages: Middle Dutch: Haghetesse, German: Hagazussa, Old Norse: Hagzissa, Old English: Haegtesse. Hedge-riding is shamanic in origin.

Hedge-riders usually go down into the Underworld in search of unseen wisdom or to talk to the spirits of the dead, which dwell in the Underworld (some may see it as a river). The Underworld is a place of wisdom, as seen by the Norse belief in the Well of Wisdom, which is guarded by Mimir, a giant who is sometimes called a water demon and who is also the god of prophecy and wisdom, ponds, and waters. Odin, the main father figure of the Germanic pantheon, went down to Mimir's well to drink to gain wisdom; he was searching for wisdom. Death can be seen in Greek mythology: Hades was the god of the Underworld, the keeper of souls.

The Upperworld is the home of the divine (for example, in the Greek pantheon Zeus rules); it's where our teachers, guides, spiritual masters, etc. are found. We travel here for answers to our questions from our guides and such.

How does one hedge-ride?

Trance and altered consciousness is essential! One must be aware of all their senses and be able to see, hear, feel, etc. things that are not there. One must have an altered state of consciousness in order for the spirit to take flight. There are stories of hedge-riders/journeyers who ride easily while in a state of utter confusion and illness. For example, some Native American shaman tribes use peyote, a psychoactive plant, that makes one's stomach purge because it is intoxicating. Peyote is an entheogen; an entheogen is a "vision-producing drug that figure in shamanic or religious rites" (Ruck et al. 1979). Entheogens are used to aid in inducing trance, to alter consciousness.

Flying ointments are often seen referenced in many areas as well. These ointments were said to, when applied on the broomstick/stang or the body of the witch, enable the witch to fly. Flying ointments often contain hallucinogenic compounds in order to alter the witch's consciousness. Traditional flying ointments were said to have contained fat of an unbaptized baby, which gave the ointment it's solubility. But in reality, this was lard. Aconite was said to have been included in many ointments, which affects the heart and aids in a feeling of flying. Belladonna produces delirium, hemlock produces excitement and later sends the body into paralysis; sweet flag, mugwort, and cinquefoil are also traditional in flying ointments. There are "traditional" flying ointment materials and compounds. These hallucinogenic drugs are NOT used like today's people would use them. They were used in proper dosages so one would not be poisoned or become ill.

Today there are various ways to induce trance. Many start off meditating or listening to drumming, rattling, etc. and then slowly go deeper into trance, getting rid of all physical feeling and moving toward creating that feeling of flight with one's spirit; usually at the beginning, some may start off listening and focusing on their breathing or heartbeat. Visualization usually comes after the beginning, but if one is still in their mind, they are not hedge-riding. Visualization helps aid the hedge-rider into being at the realm they would like to go. Once the visualization becomes more and more clear and real, you know you have crossed; when one has crossed one doesn't have to think about what is there, it just is. The "new age" term for hedge-riding could be considered astral travel because the goal of astral travel is to release your spirit in order to travel to other realms.

I'm not quite happy with the article yet, I will be writing more about this subject!

Further Reading & Recipes:
Scott Cunningham's The Complete Book of Incense, Oils, and Brews (for flying ointments, search it under the book cover thumbnail)
Diana L. Paxson's Trance-Portation: Learning To Navigate The Inner World
Christopher Penczak's The Temple of Shamanic Witchcraft
Michael J. Harner's The Way of the Shaman
Walking The Hedge Forum: Flying Ointments



☆ Ball, Martin W. Mushroom Wisdom: How Shaman Cultivate Spiritual Consciousness. Berkeley, Calif.: Ronin Pub., 2006. Print.
☆ De Vries, Eric. Hedge-Rider: Witches and the Underworld. Sunland: Pendraig, 2008. Print.
☆ Gottlieb, Adam. Peyote and Other Psychoactive Cacti. Berkeley, CA: Ronin Pub., 1997. Print.
☆ Morford, Mark, and Robert J. Lenardon. Classical Mythology. New York: Oxford UP, 2003. Print.
☆ Penczak, Christopher. The Temple of Shamanic Witchcraft: Shadows, Spirits, and the Healing Journey. St. ☆ Paul, Minn.: Llewellyn Publications, 2005. Print.
☆ Turner, Patricia, and Charles Russell Coulter. Dictionary of Ancient Deities. New York: Oxford UP, 2001. Print.
☆ Walker, Barbara G. The Woman's Encyclopedia of Myths and Secrets. San Francisco: Harper & Row, 1983. Print.

☆ Podcast: The Unnamed Path: Deathwalking

The Stang

Apr. 1st, 2010 11:10 pm
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Disclaimer: There is so much information out there that it is pretty much impossible to put it in one journal entry. What I have written is what can be seen as one or a few views. The stang has much associated with it historically. I would have had to have written a dissertation to provide all of the detail about the stang.

A stang is a long pole/branch with a forked ending (a traditional fork: i.e. fork in the road). Essentially it is a distaff, which is an Old English yarn spinning tool:

In Scotland, the stang was also used in punishment against men who beat their wives. This was called "Riding the stang" and was and is called by other various names as well: rantipole-riding, skimmington-riding, or just riding. The accused would be tied to a stang and carried around in a village with crowds that taunted him.

To most, the stang represents the world tree, being the upper part (the actual fork) rearches to the Upperworld and the lower part of the branch reaches down into the Underworld: just like the world tree. The leaves and branches reach to the Upperworld while the roots beneath the tree reach down toward the Underworld.

The stang can be seen as a central axis of the earth. Vertically being to the Upperworld and Underworld while horizontally is time (i.e. past, present, future). Being a central vertical axis, one can created a vortex around such a tool by "treading the mill" (and actually, essentially any pole will do!). Treading the mill refers to the technique of a group; each person stands with their hand out toward the center (the stang) and everyone faces forward, watching the back of the person's head that's in front of them. To go to the Underworld, one faces the other hand which is not being a "spoke in the mill" to the ground and vice versa if travelling up. To travel down, one goes in a counterclockwise direction. All the group members walk and breathe in unison. The breathing must be louder than one expects so everyone can hear each other and breathe in unison. If you can't hear, you can't be in unison! Breathing rates must increase in order to create a type of.. confusion in one's mind, which helps each person become easily trance-induced. By doing this ritual of sorts, the group creates energy that creates a vortex to pull the group members' spirits either up or down to go to the Otherworlds. Counterclockwise, as said before, leads to the Underworld, where the souls and ancient wisdom reside.

It is not uncommon to see symbols and a skull on the stang. On my stang, I have various runes of the Elder Futhark such as: Tiwaz (T: Tyr, the sky god) to represent the Upperworld because of the sky god--I may not believe in deities, but I can see how various gods represent things that are common in my practice--Ingwaz to represent Midgard (or the middle world, the physical world), Hagalaz to represent the Underworld and the unconscious, Eihwaz to aid in enlightenment and wisdom, and Algiz for protection while I travel to the Otherworlds. The skull is used as a connection to the dead and animals, but there are many other reasons one may use a skull. For example, the raven, in some traditions, is extremely important as they are connected with spirit flight.

I can't remember the exact source, but I know it was an elder book, particularly from the 18th century, stating that poles for applying flying ointments and other salves on the genitalia (applying these ointments and salves on the genitalia is important for soaking up the ingredients into the blood stream because genitalia has a very high blood supply) were disguised as something else. In this case, a stang was disguised as a distaff for weaving and simple poles were disguised as brooms for the home, which could be seen as one of the many reasons why witches have been told to ride brooms.


☆ Clifton, Chas. Shamanism and Witchcraft. St. Paul, Minn., USA: Llewellyn Publications, 1994. Print.
☆ Thompson, Sue Ellen. Holiday Symbols. Detroit, MI: Omnigraphics, 2000. Print.
☆ Treading the Mill Practical Craft Working in Modern Traditional Witchcraft. Capall Bann Pub, 2007. Print.
☆ Wallis, Robert J. Shamans/neo-Shamans: Ecstasy, Alternative Archaeologies, and Contemporary Pagans. London: Routledge, 2003. Print.
☆ Wood, Gail. The Shamanic Witch. Weiser, 2008. Print.
☆ Wright, Elizabeth M. Rustic Speech and Folk Lore. H. Milford, 1913. Print.

☆ Podcast: The Unnamed Path: Treading The Mill
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I'm currently finishing up the Ravenscliff series.  I read Sorcerers of the Nightwing a while ago and never finished it.  I had about a hundred pages left and I finished it on Tuesday?  I think.  It's such an intense series!  So much action and suspense as you read.  You're constantly wondering what's going to happen to Deven, the 100th generation of the sorcerers of the Nightwing!

Two books to read soon:
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I'm currently reading The Gargoyle and it's amazing so far. Beautifully written with excellent detail inclusion. (: What I'm currently at is when he describes himself in his current burnt state. A must read to all.

DL Link: The Gargoyle
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My first LJ layout! It's the layout I currently have. (:

Download & Instructions )
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So, there's this amazing LJ community called ebooks_crack [ link ] and we share ebooks, but not those crappy free ebooks.. I mean novels!  (:  I also joined goodreads and really enjoy it so far.  my goodreads account



Sep. 27th, 2009 03:13 pm
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Feel free to use my avatars as you wish, just please give credit.  My Iconator profile is TheOn3LeftBehind.  I'm getting back into making them.  : D  My Xanga is VampyresEssence by the way.  I may be posting there too because I love my layout.  xD


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